Hello future!

I’m looking for the future,i’m looking in the past,not one and the same what i can say?

I want the past back,to resolve all the bad things that i’ve made,to change them,for a new good life,and for a smile that will never dissapear from my face.Oh God i’m so selfish but i really want a beautiful life without the mistakes i’ve made in that horrible past,sure I have beautiful memories too but,they have gone 😐

Can I do something now?I don’t think so,waiting for the future,i want a clean future,i want to stay in my bed and to say ,,i have no obligations,no mistakes,no bad feeling”,to catch some sun rays without tears in my brown eyes and to taste the fun.